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A wedding in India is not just a day’s affair or two, but it brings with it a lot of traditions and rituals that are considered to be sacred. These beliefs are considered to shower the couple with the blessings of the elders, and also keep them away from any evil eye.
No matter where you are getting married, be it in one of the exotic wedding venues in Delhi or maybe at some lesser exotic venue like in a neighborhood garden, these traditions are followed in their full glory without even questioning their existence.
We don’t want to stir up a Hornet’s Nest with this article but have just made a list of some traditions that must be given a serious thought. It is for you to decide that —
Although it is a crime in the eyes of the law, it is still prevalent in many parts of the country. As per this tradition, the bride’s family has to give something to the groom’s family. At some places, it is asked in the name of love, and at others, it is due to the forceful demand of the groom’s side.
In this modern society with the so-called educated people, even though it is not a necessity, dowry is exchanged in the name of a token of goodwill. Even when the bride and groom are self-sufficient what’s the use of any such tradition?
So what are your views on it? Is it good? Is it bad? Do share with us in the comments section below.
Be it the change of surname after marriage or giving away of the bride all of the customs are very much prevalent in the Western culture as well. Then too, the Western culture is very much better than the Indian customs as they have a wedding band for both, the husband and the wife. In India, you can easily tell Miss, from Mrs. by just a glance at the physical representations in the form of Sindoor, Mangalsutra, and Bangles. Whereas, a Mr. remains a Mr. even after his wedding. Is it not high time to rethink this ritual and giving the freedom to a girl on how she wants to flaunt her marital status?
This is another common tradition that is practiced in Hindu weddings, according to which the bride’s father hands over her hand to the groom. This ritual became a center of controversy when a father tried to break the stereotypes with no Kanyadaan for her daughter as he believed that his daughter is not some property that he would just give away.
Another incident that created a rage among many people, was when a single mother did the Kanyadaan of her daughter. As the ritual calls for the father to present the bride to the groom, kanyadaan done by mother shattered another common stereotype.
What do you think about Kanyadaan? Was there a need for such a big commotion on a personal choice of a father and a mother? We’d really like to hear from you about your views on the subject in the comments down below.
Read Also @Everything you want to know about Kanyadaan
The primitive people used to live in fear of demonic possession and thought that the evil spirits would enter the body through the extremities. Even the clothing had some symbolic meaning and it was considered that protecting the feet is really important. Through the centuries, setting the right foot forward before the left, when setting out on a new journey was commonly considered to bring luck, and steer away from misfortune. It is because of this, that right is now considered for good and left, for bad. Much like other cultures like Greek and Islam, it is a common belief in the Indian culture that entering with the right foot forward is considered to be auspicious. This trend actually made its way to the Indian wedding traditions as well. The new bride is required to kick a vessel filled with rice or wheat with her right leg when entering the groom’s home for the first time after marriage.
Everyone seems to follow this tradition without even questioning its origin, but that’s very much the same with almost all the traditions that we follow, Isn’t it?
A girl after her wedding leaves the home of her father which isn’t considered her home in the first place as it is a common saying in India that a daughter is like a ‘Paraya Dhan’(Someone else’s property). Then, she walks into her new home, which is again not her home as she wasn’t born there and is her Sasuraal(in-laws House). Also, during the Bidaai ceremony, she is required to throw back the handful of rice behind her that symbolizes the repayment of the debt she owed to her father like she was living on rent since her childhood. I personally can’t understand any of these beliefs and it is far from my understanding of how independent working women even tolerate these kinds of traditions and rituals.
These were some of the traditions that we believe have a thin line between being a ritual and a superstition. We would love to know what you think about such traditions and if you’ll be following them in your wedding. So just go ahead and share your thoughts in the comments down below.
By Payal Shivdasani | 06 Mar, 2020
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