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Marriage in India is always seen as a big task for the parents and this is the reason that every girl for her parents is a sort of burden. Even if your parents treat you like a princess, there is always an inner thought going on in their mind to get you married before you turn 28 or 30. I am not saying that my parents don’t love me or they want to get rid of me after my marriage but my only point is why a girl is always seen as someone else’s. I want to say to my father that I am your daughter papa and will always be yours. I am not a guest in your house. I really do not like it when parents say “Tum to chali jaogi apne ghar”….this line really hurts me. So this means that the house that I am born in and living so far is not mine…. I don’t want my father to think that I am any kind of liability on him. I want to be his responsibility forever. I am sure that you all understand the huge difference between a liability and a responsibility. There are so many things that I want to say to my parents but can’t express …sad this is. And not only me… I think that every girl wants to say these things to her parents and want them to understand her.
Ok, guys let’s face it…no matter how modern you and your parents are, there is one thing that can’t be changed and that is the mindset of our parents. Even if your parents treat you and your brother equally or even you are more important to your parents, there is one stage at which they have a thought in their minds that their son is going to be their “budhape ki laathi”. I know that these days aged people are not dependent on their children but then also, there is this one time click in their cognizance. I want to say to my father that Dad, as you have your duties towards me, you will always be my responsibility too. I will always be there with you after my marriage too as I am now. No other relationship can part us or create any difference in our bond. You can always see me by your side when you want me or even when there is no need.
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There is no need to say that girls all around the world are making their parents proud. But then why there is a prerequisite to always say “beti beto se kam nahi”. When it is evidenced then why? Why parents can’t have faith in the dreams of their daughters. I know the reality is bitter but this is the veracity. Parents initially do not rely on the dreams of their daughters. Of course, they guide you for your best but their ultimate apprehension is to educate you so that you can find a more educated and settled man. They hardly comprehend your desires. There is one thing that I want to say to my parents that Mumma Papa… believe in me… I will make you proud. I have studied so hard and working to make you proud and not just to get married to a rich man.
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I know that parents always ruminate and want the best for their children. I am not even able to share clothes with anyone so I don’t know how our parents get that gut or power to send their daughters to someone’s house forever? Every parent has a dream to marry their daughter to a person who is financially stable and can fulfill all the requirements of their daughter. But why can’t they recognize that their daughter needs a man who can support her so that she can fulfill her dreams on her own and not her requirements by depending on someone else? I know that this thing can’t be expressed by most of the daughters but they want to say that Papa… I want you to realize my perception too when you find someone for me.
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When a child is born, parents devote all their time and love to the child. When the child grows, parents take more care of them as they guide him or her to have good behavior and not deviate from the right path. Further, when the child is in his or her 20s, parents start finding a suitable match for him or her so that their child can get settled. The tension does not end here, as they are parents, they always think that their child is happy. My concern is that where is your time mumma papa? I want you to live every moment of your life fully and not just take a headache from us. I never want you to compromise your life for us. I know you care but take care of yourself too. Do not settle your desires for saving finances for my marriage. I will be very happy to see you taking out time for yourself. Please sit back and relax. Everything will happen at its best when the time will arrive.
By Shashank Gupta | 06 May, 2019
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